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The old lady downstairs finally kicked it. I know, that sounds cold; however, she was like 95, in serious hand and leg pain all the time, her kids suck ass and didn’t give a rats ass about her – they never came to visit, etc. She was literally all by herself, ALL the time. She was also really dirty. She never showered and smelled REAL bad. Her apartment reeked of ass and old food. Her carpets were once beige and now almost black and matted with dirt. She would stand at the front door all day and look at the street outside. Just from standing there, the door, which was once white, was actually gray and covered in dirt. Let’s just say, no matter how “Cold” I sound, she is now in a better place.

She died in late November. Her piece of shit children are just now getting around to going to her apartment to clean it out. When I say just now, I mean they never even went there to clean out her fridge after her death. Rotting food, dirty dishes just sat there for almost 3 months.

::ENTER MICE::

Her piece of shit children came to the house last weekend and proceeded to dump all of her belongings (even mint condition antique furnitire) carelessly into a huge metal dumpster in the street. When they removed all of the furniture from the apartment (which she lived in for 60+ years) the mice that once happily co-existed with her now had no place to go. They came upstairs.

About 2 weeks ago we became INFESTED with mice. Not only is waking up to mouse droppings strewn all over your kitchen counter in the morning both gross and not safe at all, to make matters worse my half doxie dog (hunter by nature) is now ruined.

He sits in the kitchen ALL night long whining, crying, panting, barking, scratching and just plain being the most annoying pest in the universe. Our bedroom is right off the kitchen and me being the light sleeper that I am (if a mouse farts, I wake up) he has me up all night. I have not slept an entire night in more than 2 weeks. I am over-tired, cranky, irritable and just a fucking ray of sunshine to be around these days.

We tried everything. We got humane traps, disk traps, etc. Being that we are vegetarians, we could not bring ourselves to kill the mouse (or at least see it dead). We are pussies by nature. We can not eat a steak, must less murder an innocent and cute mouse. It sucks.

None of the humane traps worked. I finally had reached a point where I could not take it anymore. If I did not get some sleep soon I would wind up killing a human being. I was really not far away from snapping.

We went to store and bought glue traps. We came home, set the glue trap and within 20 minutes caught a mouse.

The mouse was TINY and dark gray and so fucking adorable I could not even take it. It got stuck in such a way that was not at all heartbreaking for me to see. I dealt with it. I took the glue board – mouse and all and threw it in the garbage. On my way upstairs I felt a pang of guilt being that it was 0 degrees outside and that the poor thing would either starve to death or freeze to death, both options equally as painful, but I just couldnt bring myself to kill it quickly. Fucking PUSSY.

This morning we get up and Craig notices that we caught another one. This one was WAY WORSE. The poor thing had half of its face stuck to the glue. It’s legs were stuck and in a desperate effort to free itself had literally ripped its own back foot off (FUCK). It’s breathing was very shallow. It looked so damn sad. I had to kill it. I couldn’t live with myself unless I did. F U C K.

Just what I need at 8AM, as soon as I open my eyes.

I put the glue board in a plastic bag and proceed to smash it with a hammer. Much to my dismay, the first time I hit it I had managed to merely crush its back and not kill it so it started to cry. I then wound up smashing it’s head and killing it. FUCK!

I feel like a scumbag. Seriously. I know its a mouse. I know it breeds disease and is dirty. I know I can’t co-exist with these things, it’s gross. I just feel really bad about killing them….

FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK….!